So radiotherapy has stopped. I'm tired. I'm pleased my lump is a lot smaller. I'm also occasionally freaking out about my dwindling options and the thought of having to decide its time to just go with it. But mostly, I'm looking forward to doing my best to forget about cancer, lumps, dying and all that jazz for a few weeks over the christmas holidays. I'm heading up north to the Cairngorms with my family, my sisters family, my parents and my in laws to spend christmas in a big house together. I think this will be great for my son, to share christmas with his cousins and get all excited together like I did with my siblings. I feel bad he doesn't get to experience that being an only child. If cancer had never been a part of my life I reckon he'd have at least one brother or sister by now :) I guess if cancer hadn't been a part of my life I also wouldn't appreciate all the little things about our time together as much as I do now. No point on dwelling on these thoughts too much cause I do have cancer.. and I still have and have had a wonderful life.
It's been a good year despite having another lodger or two in my chest.. the breeding season left a lot to be desired but I ringed my first golden eagle and even a sea eagle!! I cycled the hebrides and raised over £8000 for sarcoma UK, I had the best holiday of my life in Iceland, A great holiday staying in a cave for two weeks on the isle of islay, flew in a helicopter round the scottish mountains, Robin had his first ever birthday party (today, total success/mayhem). His birthday and christmas is always a weird time for me, its when all this shit kicked off 5 years ago. 5 years ago yesterday I was told I had cancer. 5 years ago next thursday I found out it was terminal. 5 years ago tomorrow I met my son for the first time and from that moment on I had something beautiful to focus on throughout the tough times that lay ahead.
Here's a few snaps of Iceland..
