Fundraising and the generosity of people make me happy.

So, we've decided that to raise some funds for Sarcoma UK we will get the whole Whyte clan (myself, Davy, Robin and even Beren the dog) to cycle the Hebridean Way. This will take us through the western isles from South Uist through Benbecula, North Uist, Harris and Lewis. I've always wanted to do some island hopping and we haven't yet planned a holiday for the family so it will get three birds with the one stone. It should be an amazing experience and will feel SO good to raise some cash for the future benefit or sarcoma patients. My just giving page is here if you can spare anything: https://www.justgiving.com/Michelle-Whyte1

I put it on my Facebook page this morning and I am totally overwhelmed by the response and money raised so far. Some from people i've never met. PEOPLE ARE AMAZING!

This is serving as a great distraction, the planning and training for the trip. I've stopped rubbing my back and thinking I can feel the lump return every five minutes which is good :) I have been on votrient for four weeks now, another two months and I'll get the scan to see if it's doing anything. I feel ok at the moment but i know the last couple of weeks are going to be pretty crazy.

I really want to make more of an effort to combat stress. When i'm stressed it comes out in various strange ways. I don't immediately realise that i'm stressed, so when tiny insignificant things start getting to me and I make a big deal out of nothing I am convinced it's not me in the wrong. It sucks cause it means those closest to me bare the brunt of it and that sucks. The people who mean most to me suffer most because I can't deal with being terminally ill. As if it affecting my life isn't enough. That's one thing I really hate about having cancer, the impact it has on people I love. I feel guilty about making other people sad. I wish I was a stronger person who dealt with things better. I keep telling myself it's not too late to change... and then not changing. Some of the things I want to try, to help me channel my energy, are; keeping a diary, meditation (i find this SO hard), more exercise, and more time being productive. I think I should aim for ONE of these things each day. So... we shall see..

:)